Stop Fidgeting—It’s Weak #2032

Continuing our exploration of micro moments of practicing and teaching philosophy to those we love…

Let’s go back to that game where Emerson “freaked out” for a little more practical wisdom goodness.

First…

Know this…

Our biggest “failures” are nearly ALWAYS our most powerful opportunities to grow.

IF…

!!!!!!

We approach them with the right mindset.

Side note: I’m reading John Maxwell’s latest book. It’s called “How to Get a Return on Failure.” It’s AWESOME. Notes soon.

So…

Emerson expected his match to be easy after he started strong—which made little sense considering the fact that his opponent was the youngest female in U.S. history to earn the Woman FIDE Master title.

Yah.

She was a TINY little 10-year-old girl, but she was ALSO a beast over the board.

So…

During the match, as it went longer and longer and she kept on applying more and more pressure…

Emerson started FIDGETING more and more and more.

I don’t think I’ve EVER (!!!) seen him twitch his legs up and down as much (and as fast!) as he was doing during that match.

What’s interesting is that I’ve been noticing the fact that he (like nearly EVERY other chess player) has been fidgeting like that more and more and I actually mentioned it to him briefly weeks before.

He told me it helps him think.

I wasn’t buying it, but even I have limits on the margins I’m trying to help him dominate so I let it go.

And…

As I watched this world-class fidget fest and the accompanying fear freakout play out in front of my eyes I knew we’d be chatting about it, and I knew that solving for THIS one seemingly small behavior would help defuse the whole cycle of escalating fear.

So…

We chatted about it.

We talked about the fact that our minds and bodies are connected. And that when we allow our bodies to engage in sub-optimal behaviors—whether that’s fidgeting or nail biting or hunching over or whatever—it affects our minds.

Stated positively, if we assume a POWERFUL physical presence, that ALSO affects our psychology.

As we discuss all the time in the context of eating, moving, and sleeping, our PHYSIOLOGY drives a LOT more of our PSYCHOLOGY than most of us realize.

So…

I had a very strong sense that if I could help him bring awareness to his fidgeting, then encourage him to STOP fidgeting the moment he noticed it, EVERYTHING (!) would change.

His body would stay relaxed, calm, and confident, and so would his mind.

And…

That’s EXACTLY what happened.

He didn’t fidget the rest of the tournament.

And he played like a boss, with calm confidence and poised composure we’ve come to expect.

That’s Today’s +1.

You fidget?

If so…

Stop.

It’s weak.

And, to quote Rocky going off about HIS son: “That’s not like you!!”

Let’s master our bodies.

And master our minds.

All day.

Every day.

Especially TODAY.